Ever wondered how jesus felt when he swing down from the cross, and had to slowly pull those nails from the center of his palms, and then hop along as he pulled the last one from his two feet, and then, geez how do you close your hands into fists, if ever?

Had a strange dream the other night, about the same scenario, lol... go read into it people, do your freudian and your Jungian and all that shit. The thing is that I didn't feel like I died it was just this really really nasty experience. I don't remember the whole dream, I just remember swinging down from that big monkey-bar, and pulling nails from the center of my palms.

Residual sensations: I still feel the burning pain spot in my palms when I woke up. Talk about creepy. I sat on the crapper and waited for it to pass-- I even went and put my hand in cold water. I don't remember wearing a crown of thorns in my dreams... heh... maybe I wasn't Jesus, just one of those sad arsed Mo-Fos who happened to piss off the Romans enuff to get that kinda treatment.

maybe I need a shrink, or I can psychoanalyze myself already. MArtyr syndrom, or guilt complexes or messiah whathaveyous. Ah Phuck it. It's all crap that our ego pull to make us feel very very special in a time when we obviously feel we are not. It's all bullshite folks, don't buy a single shiny silver pieces for it.

Judas:
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Do you think he deserve what he deserved?
I don't know. I mean JC definitely let him go along on his little schemes, and what is to say that JC didn't passively assent to that. I mean he had to croak for the world or it's gonna be one wasted trip, right? So, Jude did what he is supposed to... if he didn't do it, we'll are be rotting ( not that we aren't right now). Don't we have to thank the man?

Ah, Religion is full of contradiction, it's like the Atkins diet, full of commandments and strictures, all you do is eat protein and drink protein (This is my body, this is my blood), and You go through this crazy Zealot stage first, and then you slowly eased out of it to non-practicing Christian mode. Ultimately, you gain back the bagagge that you've lost, and sometimes, you even get fatter as a result. It's something you have to constantly maintain, and the founder of the movement is dead, tho' ppl still believe in him. Oh yeah... one other thing, for it to work, you have to back it with faith and hope....

but too much of this way of life will get you killed.