Hey dudettes and dudettes:

If you think "swollen" was Bent ( har-har bad pun) wait till what I have for Frou-frou!! Guyz you NEED to get this CD ( Frou-Frou "Details"), it's so so awesome, and not just because it made it into that movie "garden State"...

Here are the lyrics, if you can't make 'em out in the movie


"Let Go" by Frou-frou (go to them: WWW.frou-frou.net)
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Drink up baby down
Are you in or are you out?
Leave your things behind
'Cause it's all going off without you
Excuse me too busy you're writing a tragedy
These mess-ups
You bubble-wrap
When you've no idea what you're like

So, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown

It gains the more it gives
And then advances with the form
So, honey, back for more
Can't you see that all the stuff's essential?
Such boundless pleasure
We've no time for later
Now you can wait
You roll your eyes
We've twenty seconds to comply

So, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
------------------------------------------

I'm happy, I guess. People out there had it worst. I'm happy.
It could be worse, heck I could be worse. But why do I feel like shit sometimes?

Maybe I'm being weak now, but it's okay to want to have someone to come and hug me and tell me it's all alright and hold my hand and look into my eyes and fill me up with light so I can get through this valley of shadows, yeah?

Nah man, I'm happy. Had worse; this is a cakewalk... just missed and missing summer is all, and a truckload of deadlines snapping at my arse.

sweet dreams y'all.
>hug<

FHuck dudes, I'm alittle sad and alittle scared. It's Mondee nite and it's never good for me. When it shittes it comes in runs, yeah? Sorry about the nasty mental pic, but dudes, it's thaaat scarybad!

Firstly, it's the official end of summery 'fun': Tommorrah I go back to school. This summer's been nothing but work and work. I dunno what happened in the interim, I don't remember. There was alittle fun, but it felt like the sweetest honeyed nap-dreams of a sultry afternoon. I don't remember the sun as clear, I remember the magenta nights more, and I miss the sun even as it is not yet left. In street terms dudes, I have been schoolin' and workin' and phazing out of it. I need my moment in the sun before it's Fall. I'm scared that summer didn't say 'hi', and just waltz by. I can't stand feeling dumped by her: I CAN'T!

Secondly, the Honors paper is really really alot of life leeching work, don't get me wrong, I love what I am doing... just wondering why it has to hurt so much.... I had street burns and mat burns from concrete surfing and wrestling, but it's just hurt, you know? This feels like life bleedin'. I admit I did do some sort of crazie, I went and purposely got myself hurt, figured I'll go put things in perspective -- it didi and it didn't. My left knee's swollen and I can't flex my knee, so I walk with a swagger like peg-leg pete... freakin 'Pirates of Panzance' shite. I dunno, I need to put things in perspective. It's not only the intellectual language I need to use but the merging of Ancienne Français as well as the mordern Français as well as the Oxford English I am to write it all in. Don't get me wrong, I love my work, but it feels so hard sometimes and tiring.... Oh I fuckin hope Nietzche is right, what doesn't fuckin kill me better fuckin make me stronger, cuz I just got a scholarship for the MAsters Programme and it's just suppose to be this kinda intensity all the way.

Kiss me in the cold
Hold me tight in your light
summer coats in warm-wool sunset
I smell the camomile in your breath
and beeswax on your lips
when u kissed mine
I am dusted with asphalt and the salt in the breeze
rough and brine
and a red backward-baseball cap
and you kiss me
despite the ragged jeans
and my sweat damp T
gently carressing on my white shell choker
summer's honeyed tear is frosting into a coppery scene
scent like tears on barbed metal
estranged light
my board is propped in the narrow hall-
way amidst the calvacade of scattered shoes
sandals forlorned
for Van sneakers a step and a half away
Bikers still stubborn on the highway outside
grumbling past on thunder-loud speeds
chasing your skirts as you retreat from us all.

Man, I gotta kiss her before she goes
I can't wait six months before I see her again
I miss her
I love her
does she knows my heart's breaking?
My black cable knit sweater is calling,
like a cool drinking buddy holding out a shot of sours
"yeah fucks" like sour in the mouth and
then going down the throat burning bitter
arsonry in the stormach
spreads out a mesh of searing veins from the guts.

so, how do I hold my insides in,
when she's bent on tearing it all out?